I am excited to introduce to you to Lisa Papez aka the Fat Yogini who so kindly accepted to be part of our Body Love Now photo project for the Love Your Body Summit 2016. Not only did Lisa have such an amazing personality, someone I felt I could have talked to for days, but she also had two super cute dogs, and I love me cute puppies! Lisa share so much with my that day, and I am so happy to see much of that has been captured in her answers to the questions we asked her. I hope you take time to read her wise words, they are really inspirational.
Lisa thank you so much for welcoming me into your home, and being part of this project.
What challenges have you faced in your relationship with your body?
I was a tiny, petite child. Small both in height and weight for my pre-pubescent years. And do you know what I remember about those years? I remember how self-conscious I felt when the whole class would line up for our weight as part of our annual school health exam and I weighed the *least*.
And then puberty happened. And I started getting ‘chubby’. And from then on, I would feel self-conscious because I worried I weighed the *most* among my peers.
Whether I was thin or not, fat or not, I felt self-conscious and at odds with my body. It never felt right. Or good enough. Guess how much of that had to do with my actual weight? Very little. But it was what it was, and it was the only thing I knew. And so I hated myself because I did. And I hated my body because I did. And maybe I will never know all the reasons why I struggled so much with body image, though I have identified a great many of them.
These are some of the internal challenges I faced.
Some of the external challenges are hard to describe. I know I felt I was treated differently. Sometimes, I felt I was treated differently because I was the fat kid, girl, woman. Sometimes, I felt I was treated differently by other lesbians because I didn’t fit what was the stereotype at the time, being more feminine in my appearance then was popular at the time.